This week my eleven year old German Shepherd Zena died. She was a beautiful dog, strong and graceful- running across the yard she was poetry in motion. She was an Alpha female, and took her job of protecting the family very seriously. Every day she patrolled the boundaries of our fence, and every evening she lay in front of the door, blocking the entrance to anyone who was not invited.
She was at times an imperious girl, barking sharply at our smaller dog Bear or one of the cats when she felt they needed correction, and we were not moving fast enough to suit her. She liked an orderly household, and wasn't shy about making her opinion known if she felt someone was not towing the line.
Zena loved our kids, and I think she considered them her puppies. She was gentle and affectionate with them, and watched them like a hawk. If someone tried to snatch their food off their plate, she was immediately there, barking orders. Every night she lay in front of my daughter's bedroom, guarding the door against intruders. She was alert to any sound, any motion that occurred, and was always watching where the kids were, what they were doing, looking for any possible threats or misbehavior. She gave our household a sense of safety and security, a deep love that surrounded all of us.
Recently she hadn't seemed herself, so we took her in to our family vet. Sadly, he found a large tumor on her spleen, and we were told her time was short. We arranged for comfort care for her and took her home, thinking we had a few days to be with her, maybe even a few weeks. We wanted our older daughter to be able to visit her from college and say goodbye, for our kids to have a few last moments with her. But in the small hours of that night, Zena died. We did our best to make her comfortable after our younger daughter alerted us to the change in her condition, to tell her how much we loved her. The last thing she had done before she died was to drag herself to my daughter's door, to guard her. Even when she was feeling so sick, that was her priority. Protect the puppies at all costs. While she was in her last moments, she kept looking in front of her, and would suddenly break into happy panting. She looked as though she was interacting with someone we couldn't see, someone she recognized and was very happy to see. Shortly after that, she died. I choose to think that she had an escort who came to get her, to bring her to the next world without fear or pain. She certainly deserved that. She was one of the most pure spirits I have ever known.
Rest in peace, Zena. You did your job well, and you were much loved. I hope you are surrounded by family in the afterlife, by tennis balls and chew toys, and rabbits that you can chase without harming. I hope you come to visit us, perhaps sleeping on our beds or guarding the doors you slept in front of for so many years. You will always be welcome to surround us with your love and presence.
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